The first thing you should know about this post is that I’m writing it on a Friday night. If that doesn’t qualify me as an authority on the topic, I don’t know what would, except maybe another entry Saturday night.
Loneliness isn’t always piteous. Sometimes it's consensual. Bookworms know its succulence, as do monks, painters, and anyone who likes long walks. Other times it’s worse than piteous. Extended time alone sharpens self-awareness, and if you don’t like your self—or any of its component parts—agonies of insufficiency will wrack you, perhaps to the point of despair. Alone, you judge without a basis for comparison. Reference points dim and disappear. Yeah, your menial job and history of dead-end relationships make you doubt the possibility of anything better, but communicating with others can put your plight in perspective. One of the most useful functions of a friend is to remind you that your predicaments are not unique. They also remind you, some by personal example, that beneficial change really happens.
The less mediated the communication, the better. Instant messaging is unignorably mechanical. Phones and Skype bring people closer but not exactly together. Face-to-face conversation stands head and shoulders above other options, especially now. In this digitized world, so much has become remote, including many relationships. The fact that you can unite apart doesn’t mean that you should.
Loneliness isn’t always piteous. Sometimes it's consensual. Bookworms know its succulence, as do monks, painters, and anyone who likes long walks. Other times it’s worse than piteous. Extended time alone sharpens self-awareness, and if you don’t like your self—or any of its component parts—agonies of insufficiency will wrack you, perhaps to the point of despair. Alone, you judge without a basis for comparison. Reference points dim and disappear. Yeah, your menial job and history of dead-end relationships make you doubt the possibility of anything better, but communicating with others can put your plight in perspective. One of the most useful functions of a friend is to remind you that your predicaments are not unique. They also remind you, some by personal example, that beneficial change really happens.
The less mediated the communication, the better. Instant messaging is unignorably mechanical. Phones and Skype bring people closer but not exactly together. Face-to-face conversation stands head and shoulders above other options, especially now. In this digitized world, so much has become remote, including many relationships. The fact that you can unite apart doesn’t mean that you should.
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